Are we too connected? Are you reading this?

A few weeks ago I was in Philadelphia for a RE Bar Camp. As always I learned a ton, meeting new people and getting to see old friends.

Now, usually people associate Bar Camp with people who are so plugged into the technology side of Real Estate that we never actually meet anyone other than in a virtual world. Well, sometimes that’s true. But, because of Bar Camps I have had an opportunity to meet some pretty amazing people, who, because we are in the right setting, can share some pretty amazing things.

Two of these people are Derek Massey and Bill Lublin; and what they shared hit me like a ton of bricks. They basically said something that I had been feeling for some time now but had not yet verbalized: that in an effort to be the ultimate in responsiveness we are damaging relationships with those we choose to spend time with.

What it comes down to is this – whether it’s our family, or a client, or whomever, if we look at our iphone or droid every time time it buzzes we damage a connection with the person in front of us – do we not?

In other words, I’m addicted to the damn thing.

Now being addicted gives the connotation that I do not have control. I will not accept that. I have it. Last weekend, I turned off my iphone on Friday night, checked my email Saturday night after my kids were asleep, and repeated the pattern on Sunday (I got my voice mail through Google Voice). You know what? It felt great.

But it’s not just the holstered phones we carry that makes us like some digital outlaw six-shooter renegades.

It’s not the stuff on the phones: email, Twitter, Facebook, and Four Square that make us addicts. It’s that we use these tools while in the presence of those we love most.

Think about it…connecting with strangers over connecting with your child, husband, wife, etc.

My wife recently told me that every time I reach for my buzzing iphone my daughter looks dejected. It made me sick.

So I admit it – I’m an addict.   And it’s just as serious as all the other addictions because it hurts people I love.

And on this Father’s Day Eve I choose to stop it.

I hope you will too.